Here’s Tessa Fowler as a 5’1″ Star Wars stormtrooper who is not wearing the approved uniform. This would be a good place to use that “these aren’t the droids you’re looking for” line, right? Only it would be these are the droids you’re looking for, none too subtly referring to her gorgeous boobs as droids. But nope! Not gonna do that. That would be so predictable. Tessa’s boobs are not the droids you’re looking for. Truly, you do not want to see these droids. Stop staring at her droids, buster, you are seeking some other droids. Dude, cut it out! You are looking for droids and Tessa’s boobs aren’t them, and now you’re all distracted from your mission. Vader will not be pleased. He’ll show up and be all “did you find the droids yet?” And you’ll be like “duh… no find droids. Tessa boobies.” And Vader (who is asexual thus unfazed by Tessa) is like “Dude, you are so getting the choke hold.”
Give yourself the choke hold at TessaFowler.com, home of quite possibly the greatest pair of boobs on the internet.
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